These last two weeks have been quite a learning process for me about Vietnam Veterans. Two weeks ago if you’d asked me what I thought about Vietnam Veterans, I would have said, ‘Who?” Now I have a huge sense of appreciation and compassion for them. Most of what I know has come through getting to hear, all these years later, from my high school youth group buddy, Lieutenant Tim Lickness, an infantry platoon leader with the 101st Airborne Division, who in 1968 was jumping out of helicopters in the jungles of Vietnam, leading troops on patrols — one as long as 42 days — engaging in fierce fighting, with death all around him, never dry in the rainy season and never enough water to drink in the dry, and watching his men get killed over and over again in his nightmares to this day.
And what was I doing in 1968? I was writing: Look all around you and see what is real / Hear what is true and be sure what you feel / Touch someone near you in love if you can / Give all you have and be part of God’s plan. Tim gave all he had, and I did, too, but from entirely different places, and entirely different realities. I now have a new respect for his reality.
I read that over two million Americans went to Vietnam over the course of this conflict. Tim tells me only 10% actually were involved in combat. That means 200,000 actually fought on the ground. Fifty-eight thousand of them died. That’s roughly one in four. Not real good odds. You go out with a squad of eight and you know two them aren’t coming back. On his worst day, Tim saw all eight of his men perish. He said he was never the same after that.
Now imagine you work or you worship next to someone who’s been through this. Do you know about it? Unlikely. Do they want to talk about it? Unlikely. So there is a gap in your relationship. I feel like the events of these last two weeks have closed that gap some for me and I feel richer for it. I’ve tried to share it with you and I hope it’s done some good.
It’s been most fulfilling for me to discover what my learning process has meant to Tim. He has thanked me numerous times for showing up at the moveable wall representing the Vietnam War Memorial in Menifee, California last week. Unexpected road work made Chandler and me late for the service at which Tim spoke, but that didn’t matter to him. It only mattered that we showed up.
And over and over again, Tim attested to the fact that he’s only making it through his continual transition back to “normal” life because of those who have shown up for him. It’s no big deal. It takes no preparation. Just show up. Remember that, because it’s true for all of us. If anyone you know is in trouble, just show up. You’re not sure what to do? Just show up. You don’t think you can make a difference? Just show up.
Don’t you dare miss our BlogTalkRadio interview with Tim.
“When you lie you build a fence between you and God, and its hard to talk to Him.” – Lieutenant Tim Lickness
John Fischer The Catch 
Thanks again for more messages about our Vietnam Vets. So true about building a fence between us and God it is so hard to be close. I like what you said show up for these vets and show up for God thru his son Jesus Christ. I have learned even more about what happened thru these very intense messages and Thank God for folks who served like Tim Lickness. Take care, and God Bless always.
My ex-husband was a Vietnam veteran. He was fortunate enough not to be in combat. We had just met before he left and we wrote each other. When he cane home he said they were under mortar attack once and had to hit the foxhole in front of the tent. He also shared that a fellow soldier in the tent next to him had gotten a Dear John letter and took his pistol and blew his brains out! We can’t fathom the things they all went through, even those who weren’t in combat but I always thank them when I see them and they have a hat that says they’re a Vietnam veteran!! I’m proud of everyone who served and may God bless them all!!!
“Just show up.”
There is a lot of depth to that short sentence, those three little words.
It’s a simple enough concept and yet, sometimes, a scary prospect.
There’s no reason to fear, though, because “perfect love casts out fear.”
Just show up.
John, I’m wondering what Chandler’s take was on visiting the Wall.
Did very many other younger people attend?
Did Tim and Chandler get to discuss things at all?
What was Tim’s take on the younger people who visited?
I hope you’ll have Tim back as a guest on BlogTalkRadio again soon.
I’m interested in hearing how he resumed his relationship with Jesus after his ordeals abroad and his struggles here at home.
Thanks!!
Shalom, Peace…
Good questions. I would say that Chandler was the only person (out of, I would guess about 250 people) who was his age. They were all older people who remember. Tim was preoccupied with relatives and friends so he and Chandler didn’t get a chance to talk. An interesting idea about having him back. I’ll think about that.
Have to confess some sadness that more young people didn’t show up.
I remember, though, that when I was their age it wasn’t high on my list of priorities to attend events that recognized, remembered or otherwise honored the generations of my parents and grandparents.
I certainly don’t remember what reasons, valid or lame, I offered up to excuse myself but I do recall seeing the slight tinge of sadness or disappointment in their faces when I said that I wouldn’t be coming to their special occasion.
While I wouldn’t say it straight to their faces, my real (shameful) reason was that I simply didn’t want to be involved with these old out-of-touch geezers. I think they already knew that – I wasn’t pulling the wool over their eyes – but they continued to graciously invite me and my generation to the events that marked memorable times in our personal and national history.
Now that I’m my parents’ age, I regret not having engaged more with those “old fogies” and listened to more of their war stories and reminiscences of growing up during the Depression.
I miss them.
I’m sad, too, that I didn’t choose to show up for them.
We’re trying to create a different picture here than what you painted. We want to get together “old fogies” (boomers) with Millennials in real relationships. We believe they will find they have more in common than not. Maybe you can help us with this.
Am already at work at it.
As the saying goes, “Better late than never.”
And, it’s even better when there more years in front of us than when they’re behind us already.
For as you and us other “old fogies” know, someday never comes…
🙂