So did you call?
I haven’t heard back from anyone yet about calling someone you love just to call. No favor. No agenda. Just a call, because I realized, with one of my friends last week, that life can be over so fast you lose your chance. You pick up the phone and they’re not there anymore.
The T. S. Eliot quote, “Where is the life we have lost in living?” often haunts me. What is life for, if not for relationships? And what is wrong with our living, if in it, we have no time for the people we love – even the people we would love to love if we had the chance? Why not give ourselves that chance? Why not take it?
I have one particular friend who loves to chat. Sometimes I hesitate to call him because I’m moving faster than that. I need a quick answer, but I know my pace will slow down as soon as I get him on the line. He’s made different choices. He lives his life at a pace that allows him to do this, or at least he makes conversation a priority. I’m the agitated one, ripping through my moments with not a care for anyone but myself and my agenda. What is life for if not for connecting with friends long enough to be meaningful? Does something have to be set aside for this? Then set it aside.
I’m obviously speaking to myself today. You may not need this, but I desperately do. That’s why I’m not going to let it go. One Catch last week was not enough, at least not enough for me.
Another one of my friends sent me a Bruce Cockburn song after reading last week’s Catch. It’s the title cut from his 2006 album, “Life Short Call Now.” I am including the lyrics here, but you might want to blow $.99 and get it on iTunes. It’s guaranteed to make you call someone.
Life Short Call Now
by Bruce Cockburn
Billboards promise paradise
And tattoos “done while you wait”
Possible futures all laid out
On the sweeping curve of the interstate
Got no city, got no land
Got no lover, got no wife
How many ways to say goodbye
Can one man fit in a nomad life?
Life short call now
Life short call now
Life short call now
Life short call now
Lone car waves, then it wanes
Leaves only voices in the hall
And in the room next door to mine
The bed is banging on the wall
You’ve no idea how I long
For even one loving caress
For you to step into my heart
Without deception or duress
Life short call now
Life short call now
Life short call now
Life short call now
John Fischer The Catch 
Another great thought-provoking, action-inducing commentary. How many friends and even relatives have I not bothered to get together with recently because I’m too busy doing “busy” stuff that I will never remember? With a slight twist, it made me think of Jim Witter’s song “Forgiveness.” The song tells the story of someone reading a former “best” friend’s obituary in the paper, and then thinking about all the times he’d never taken the opportunity to reconcile, or even just pick up the phone to make a call. Well, I have some things to do this week, but will I?
My mom was in a car accident last week. It was bad but there was not a scratch on her. In the process of checking her out, the doctor reminded us that she is frail and that her heart is not as strong as we thought. She has such a spunky personality, it’s easy to go into denial about her heart condition. So I am in the process of changing my schedule so i can make the drive to see her and my dad nore often. So worth it!
John, I did call!! Well sort of, I emailed a note telling them why I remember them often in my thoughts & prayers. Why I have fond memories of days gone by – didn’t have a phone number, but I made contact and it was welcomed.
Thanks for the reminder – I still have children in my house and I need to put down the remote, the phone, the “gadgets” and TALK with them while they are still there to listen and willing to talk to me.
Remember to answer your eamil too Friends are waiting for reponses not understanding why they are not getting them and most of the time it is because we got too busy .Not that they did anything wrong. They are still praying for you and waiting. The beauty of email they do not have to be long and they are sent and open at each person convience. Show Some Love answer those emails.
OK Marya. Thank you!
dare I admit that its my 2012 resolution to be more intentional to stay in touch with those I care about. Called an older brother on New Years Day. He’s a wise old geezer and asked me, ”why’d ya call?” I told him. It started a really nice exchange of dialogue that I would have missed if I had ignored the nudge. My job and some of my hobbies involve continual communication with virtual strangers, and I realized that I hadn’t left any energy left for those I say I love. Wake up call!! Thanks for your daily ”cultivation”.Sometimes you really dig up what’s gotten trodden into habit form,and needs a little fresh air and sunshine in order to let the spiritual seeds grow!
My favorite is when you call and call and call and email and email and email and the only response you get is “I’m busy”. Or better yet when you ask your friends directly if they have time for you and they say “no”. Then you know it’s time to kick them to the curb and move on. They obviously don’t care. Sometimes all someone is looking for is a quick response or a quick text to say “Hey I’m thinking of you….hope you are well”. When they ask if you can get together instead of repeatedly saying no, give them a time frame: “maybe in a couple weeks”….and then stick to your answer. Great loving and caring friends are so hard to come by. You never know when you will need one after a major life event or job loss.