I had a wrestling match with Chandler last night … and won.

I had just dealt with him over a lack of respect when I thought of it. We used to wrestle more when he was younger and I had been thinking about this, realizing that such physical entanglement is a healthy thing for fathers and sons and was looking for an opportune moment to renew the experience. I sensed this was the time. We were struggling emotionally with each other, anyway. Why not work it out physically? Maybe I could still reinforce that respect issue.

I saw him smile when I challenged him and that made me happy. He had a friend over and announced proudly what we were going to do. So we made the friend a referee. Three minutes and a few rug burns later I had him pinned for the count.

I won’t be able to win at this much longer. He is 13 but has the size and muscle of a 16-year-old. I knew I had a chance of losing when I proposed this, and that would have been okay, too, but I must say, it was nice to still have the upper hand. I still have the weight advantage, but not for long.

I could tell right away how good this was for our relationship. The struggle, the close proximity, the mutual respect all played into it.

Struggle is an important part of any relationship. It’s a part of our relationship with God. He would rather have a fight than feigned religiosity. He wrestled all night with Jacob, and even let him win, though He left him with a permanent limp so he wouldn’t forget with whom he wrestled. I can’t imagine that God didn’t enjoy that.

My wife has a former business partner with whom she has struggled for years. It’s a love/hate relationship with their best ideas well fought out. He knows Marti is a born-again Christian, and has consistently combated this with questions such as why God would make a baby that was deformed. To which Marti always replies, “I don’t know; why don’t you ask Him?”

It’s a simple answer, but not a simplistic one. Marti knows that God desires a real relationship with each one of us personally, and she is always doing what will encourage that relationship whether or not it’s even been formed yet.

I think Marti is on to something here. Instead of thinking of people’s issues with God as a barrier to faith, why not welcome them as an opportunity to confront God in a real way. That’s what He wants anyway. He wants the truth; He doesn’t want someone’s half-hearted worship.

Since we know God likes to wrestle, why not challenge people to go to the mat with Him? However it comes out, they will be closer as a result. I know because I’ve wrestled with Chandler and won something more than the match. Though I’m a little sore today, I told him he could have a rematch any time. We’ll see about that.