Ever get what you want and wish you hadn’t? I did last night in our teleconference Bible study. Here’s what happened.
I did a lovely piece of teaching (with everybody muted, of course – no one to question me or interrupt my train of thought). I told my story. It was a splendid illustration of what I was trying to teach about feeling totally inadequate for life and finding that God was adequate through me. I wrapped it all up neatly with a bow, as speakers are want to do, and then I made the mistake of unmuting everybody and turning it over to Marti, who, of course came along, tugged on the bow, and everything unraveled right in front of me. All I could think of was How do we fix this in the ten minutes we have left?
Here I’ve been preaching vulnerability, and what we got – horror of horrors – was vulnerability… two people’s current life situation with no way to solve it for them. My story had a conclusion. It had a happy ending – a silver lining. These stories are just hanging there full of raw emotions. We asked for vulnerability; we got it; and I didn’t like it.
Marti loved it. Typical. She’s always messing it up for me. But lo and behold, I’m finding out later that many others loved it too. Here’s what one person (Joe) just wrote me: “As we catch a glimpse of Mark, Jerry, Sylvia, & Miss N Carolina (Carol?), we form perceptions based entirely on what they say because we have nothing else – no facial expressions, no body language, not much past history, just a voice. They took the risk to be honest, and I feel many of us connected, we could relate. And now these people are in my thoughts and prayers. God, whether things get better or worse for them in this broken world, lead them to the peace you lead Job to… Amen.”
As a teacher, with everyone on mute, I can make everything come out the way I want to. But open up the lines and it gets complicated. I’m smart enough to know that’s what I want, but dumb enough to still fight with it. I want to solve everyone’s problem when the important thing is for us all to connect with each other in the middle of life, unmuted.
The first step in finding adequacy for life is to embrace our inadequacy and turn to the Lord. Just don’t do it on my teleconference Bible study time. It messes everything up.
I have a ways to go here, I think.
Great lesson for all of us John. I have often run into this situation when leading a bible study. About the time I think “I got it, and here it is”; someone comes along and rips apart the package I so carefully prepared and shows me, “no it’s about this too”.
FYI – still no facebook button on the emails.
“two people’s current life situation with no way to solve it for them”
Yes John but most things can’t be solved by us FOR other people. As you have said so many times life is messy, faith is messy, belief and unbelief are messy. Nothing in real life has a pretty bow on it, at least for long. What you help us find is a way of looking at God’s provision as always enough.
Dear brother John, sorry but I found today’s Catch to be hilariously funny! Not that I was laughing @ you, yet with you, in regard to how it seems you were a bit “frustrated” (lack of a better term) after doing a great job of explaining “…about feeling totally inadequate for life and finding that God was adequate through me.” And how I could sooo relate to that as you were talking in how I recalled the last prayer I had the chance to share w/ my Mom, before her heart by-pass surgery and God showed up and both me & my Mom saying boy couldn’t you jus about feel His presences as we prayed! I felt blessed about that then and now becauz she did pass away a few days later. Then Marti coming along and “unraveled” the bow, which made me laugh then and now, becauz that’s when i felt & thought it was Ok for me to share the story of “God showing up” in my life, when i felt sooooooo inadequate to help my Mom.
And I really laughed sooooooo hard as you wrote: “two people’s current life situation with no way to solve it for them.” And I was sooo moved listening to those wonderful ladies stories, so sure enough I thought about adding my two cents, by saying how about finding a local church and Marti saying to me, and me feeling a bit “slapped up side the head” LOL by her saying: “Mark we are the church!” Boy I needed yet didn’t want to hear that. So I thought to offered my email address and as I went to sleep last night, I thought more about it, that I should also offer my phone number too, which I did and gave to Marti to share w/ any Catch member that would rather share over the phone as opposed just by email – and I’m looking forward to drawing closer to the Catch family members and have some fun, plus sharing, caring and praying together.
PS and thx sooo much 4 sharing Joe’s insights & thank brother Joe 4 your prayers too – they’re very much appreciated… 🙂
I guess you could also have titled this post “Life, unsolved”. I’m a chronic solver of other people’s problems myself. At 61 years of age I’ve caught on that I’ve wasted I-don’t-want-to-guess how many brain-hours “solving” problems for other people. Wasted, I say, because, oddly enough, despite my insights and practical advice, none of their problems ever got solved by me! However, now that I found some special duct tape (visible only to me), and have learned to apply it to my mouth when I’m tempted to solve yet another problem for someone else, lo and behold, some of my own most wearisome & worrisome problems have been miraculously solved! Maybe me not talking over God is working, huh?
Ohhh Robbielewislowe, jus wanted to quickly add a great big thx 4 your comments and i know that i know how i need some of that, “special duct tape” 4 my own good too! 🙂
Robbie – Where can I order a roll of that “special duct tape”? On second thought, maybe I should just order a whole case!
John, I came to the second session to hear your lesson. I had prepared the lesson ahead of time and wanted to hear the topic expanded. I was very disappointed at the end of that evening because no one was muted and the hour turned out to be only a hodgepot of comments that took us no where. I decided not to return again. I am please to hear that normally you do prepare a lesson and everyone is muted. I think you have to decide what is the purpose of these studies and direct the sessions accordingly. We all have problems and they don’t get solved by dumping them into the middle of an open forum.
To me this is a very sad, yet a honest comment: “We all have problems and they don’t get solved by dumping them into the middle of an open forum.” I jus wished i could agree a bit more w/ it… and add no one, i think was looking to get them “solved” yet wanted to share them and start to understand, i think some where Jesus said, or I take it what He said, to share our burdens with one another – and that does i truely think / believe begin the process of getting them “solved.” 🙁
PS yet Susan M., i do sincerely hope & pray you do join us again @ the Catch telphone conferences and give us another chance, you may, you jus may come to really enjoy and even like a few of us… 🙂
Hi Susan – I also hope you will reconsider and return to the study, and as one of the “dumpers”, I’m sorry I added to your frustration (and John’s). I think that since a theme of our study is being real about our lives with others, some of us just felt we needed the practice. If we are truly going to connect with folks “in the marketplace”, what better way to start than by connecting with each other in a “safe” place, like the study group? Opening up like that was extremely hard for some of us, but it was practical application of what we are learning. Again, I do hope you’ll call in again.